The weather today has been less then desirable.  The rain is cold, what snow we had is gone, and well everything just looks dirty.  I wanted to curl up and watch a good movie.  Now, I pay good money on a monthly basis for about 500 channels.  I would have to immediately eliminate about fifty for the simple fact that they are in Spanish and as much as I love a good enchilada, I have never learned a word of Spanish.  Eliminate another hundred news channels and fifty more weather channels, despite what some people in my house think, these are not channels.  So, I am at roughly three hundred channels and nothing to watch.  I decided to head to the only video store in our town.  Why is we have almost forty thousand people in this town and we have one video store?  Anyway, I remembered that my darling teenage son still had a game in the basement that was rented over Christmas break.  I didn't even try to do the math on this, but I knew it was a whole bunch.  I wanted a movie and I had no choice but to think up the best story I could and hope that the person waiting on me had a game hiding son at home as well. 

Before I went, I decided I may have to may a quick get away.  I could picture all the employees staring as I tried to find the perfect movie.  I was sure they would all be laughing hysterically at the stores largest fine holder.  I looked up a few movies.  The one that came to mind was relatively new and the main character had Parkinson's.  I was wanting a "feel good" type of movie, so I checked out some of the reviews.                                                                   
This is what some viewers had posted

"One particular scene in the movie was wrenching to watch -- at least for me: Maggie expresses to Jamie the painful fact that she will necessarily need and depend on him far more than he would ever need and depend on her.
One of the hardest things about having PD is knowing that – unless there are major breakthroughs soon - -   as the disease progresses we may not be able to take care of ourselves. Maggie may need help with buttons now. Eventually she may need help with walking, eating, and getting in and out of bed.
Maggie also says something like, “I had things to do and places to see!”

I read that last comment about a thousand times, seriously, I couldn't stop reading the same thing over and over.  I had things to do and places to see.  That is some heavy shit right there.  Now, I haven't even seen the movie and I am already analyzing things from it.  What did she mean by that?  Was she no longer going to be able to do those things?  Was she not going to be able to go to the places she wanted to go?   She appears to be young by her photo on the cover. I had read where she had early signs of this shit ass disease, why was she feeling this way?  Maybe she is so unsure of the future, that she fears she will never do the things that she as a little girl dreamed of.  I am feeling this girls pain from one line.  Just the other night I was watching Dog the Bounty Hunter,  yea yea, I know how lame is that?  None the less, I was watching as they drove past some of the most beautiful beaches I have ever seen.  I have always wanted to go to Hawaii.  The beaches, the sun, the fancy fruit drinks with umbrellas.  I know that I am able to do anything right now, but what about ten years from now.  In ten years I will be fifty.  Fifty in my book of life is supposed to be enjoyable, more financially secure, able to travel without the worry of children or schedules.  What will I be like at fifty?

I'm hoping to find myself driving along the shoreline with these licence plates.  I didn't rent the movie, hell can you imagine how long this fucking post would have been.  I have to stop thinking so much, period.  I have to remember to live for today.  I know in my heart, that one day I will be burning up priceline.com for the best rates to the big island.  I may not be wearing a bikini, remember I am a well nourished girl.  I may be the old lady in the water that all the kid like, because I shake real good, and makes kick ass waves.  I will get there.  So I will leave you with a few things I have learned
Popular Hawaiian Words and Phrases!
January - ‘Iaunuali (ee-ya-oo new-ahlee)           The month I will go
A`ole pilikia= No problem                              because when I get there, no problems
`O wai kou inoa? What is your name?      In case Andy Garcia is there (make sure it's him)
Mahalo E Ke Akua No Keia La = Thanks be to God for this day             (in case Andy is there)
pololi   =   hungry                                             Hey, gotta stay well nourished

Today has been a good day.     Aloha